it was uneventull. short and sweet. i had the pleasure of wearing their lovely hospital garb again. joy. 
i think with each visit dennis becomes more and more overjoyed that he’s not a woman. lucky bastard!
had my questions answered, and the only question the doc asked was “how’s your nausea?” that was easy to answer. “i have none.” i didn’t have a lot to say but i did ask about my dreams and if it was normal to feel detached from all this and have negative thoughts. Apparently this man know all too well. see, his own wife is pregnant now and he says it’s very normal to feel like that and went on to say that it normally changes after a person starts to show which he said happens around 4 months. that was good to hear from him too. yay.!
he said i could take tylenol pm to help me sleep. dennis was more than happy to get my sleepless ass to the nearest pharmacy afterwards. told me i should lay off the bread, carbs, and pasta. but not because he thought i was overweight or putting it on too fast. (btw, i’m 4 lbs heavier than last month) for you women who know what those foods cause, or at the very least, what they don’t help to get rid of… yes, i’ve been blessed with it the last 2 weeks. lovely thing to take with you on a honeymoon cruise. ugh!
7am and i can’t stay asleep, as is usual these days. i guess it’s just as well considering i have to go back to work early tomorrow.
In 3 hours we have my 2nd ob appointment. i’ll be able to finally ask some questions i’ve had on my mind for a while including what if anything i can take for headaches as well as ask and hopefully take care of a very annoying problem i’ve been having these last 2 weeks. (i’ll spare your ears of the details) I’ve been having less than possitive thoughts about this pregnancy. not in the sense that I don’t want it, but for instance my dreams have been negative mostly consisting of the baby’s death due to my negligence. ie, one night dreamt that i put the baby down to sleep one night, then got up the next morning and forgot about it completely. i went on with my business and later that evening i remembered that i had a baby and went looking for it and couldn’t find it. even when i’m awake i have thoughts like this. man, maybe i’m just stressing cuz i’m afriad i can’t do a good enough job, i dunno. I still haven’t gotten excited about this baby like i think i should be. I told dennis yesterday that i feel sortof indifferent to it. Dennis is excited and nervous… but mostly excited. I wish i felt that way now. I think i’m afraid of getting too attached to it just yet tho… what if i lose it? But I try not to think about it too much. i take my daily prenatals (still feel odd about that word) and am reminded that something is happening to me whenever i can’t get into another pair of pants. I’m waiting patiently to get out of this ‘funk’.
speaking of clothes. as of the end of last week, i no longer fit into any of my original pants or shorts. I bought 2 new pair during xmas. one is a 12 the other a 14. both were loose on me when i got ‘em. the size 12 is tight now, and the 14 is the only one i can wear and be comfortable. no fucking kidding! so, yesterday we went to sawgrass mills and i found a couple pair of 14s that are probably more like size 16 because they’re so freakin wide and i have 2 pair of maternity shorts that fit pretty good. I gotta say the only thing i’ve enjoyed about being pregnant so far is that i can eat like a hog and not feel guilty or beat myself up about having gained weight anymore. i may never fit into my old old clothes again, and i’m surprised to discover that i don’t really give a shit anymore.
ah! i’m taking a breather now between wash cycles… i’ve done 2 loads and have at least 5 more to go then when dennis gets home he’ll have his to do. we have to get ready for the cruise by monday cuz we won’t have time during the week.
This house still looks like we just moved in yesterday. the third bedroom is like our storage room jam packed with crap. more crap in the living/family room, yet more crap in the garage. Today i finally did something to improve the house and gave my brother’s old room an overhaul. it looks like it isn’t even part of the house it’s so damned clean and neat. YAY! i’m sooo proud of it i’ve caught myself staring at it a few times. :)
The dogs have officially been expelled from our bedroom and now will have to sleep in the garage. maybe now i’ll finally be able to get a good night’s rest. They can be damned annoying at night all of them. scully with her retching, bullet with his nightmares and tela with her nonstop lip smacking. another YAY! for moving positive change..
hopefully in about 3 weeks time we’ll get ourselves a new dishwasher. the one we have is useless and i must have done about 3 sink fulls of dishes this morning. we’re in the 21st century for christ sake, i shouldn’t have to be doing all this work! We brushed about 2 lbs worth of hair off tela. saying that she sheds is a very big understatment. That might be a problem when we have this baby. I mean, i find her hair in my food sometimes it just floats around like lint. yesterday i did her ears. she was pretty good about it and took a snooze while i dug in there. yuk! they were gross. she got potty ears.
bullet found a hole in the fence last week and thought it would be nice to trapse around in the neighbors yard for a while. that was fun. he was real proud of himself too, that little bastard! dogs are fun @#$#$@!!!!!! now we have a fence to repair and add to our costs. YAY for flatulent pets! LOL!
i’m a new woman - thanks to a good night’s sleep!
My little brother moved out of our house last night for good. It was really kinda sad seeing him go. He seemed real happy and excited about leaving, tho, so I know he feels he’s doing the right thing. I hope things turn out ok for him there. It’s going to feel real empty in the house for me now but i know being alone again will be good for me and dennis.
woohoo! we can fornicate anywhere we please again! LOL!
i got about 5 hours sleep last night thanks to my worsening insomnia which i think shouldn’t last much longer because it never does. but god i feel lousy. I’ve had this headache since 10 pm last night and it will not GO AWAY! in the last 45 minutes has gotten worse and bossman wants me to go to a 2pm meeting. i already went to his 9am meeting which i kinda slured my way thru and i’ve got another at 8pm which i’m definitely not going to make.
I don’t think i can hold out tho. it takes a lot for me to get queezy (unless i’m a passenger in a car) but this pain has gone on too long and it’s turning my stomach. i may just throw in the towel and call it quits.
Looks like things have been busy today on LJ. Unfortunately (or fortunately as the case may be) I haven’t been able to read much of anything. nor will i be reading anything until sometime next week.
dennis and i will be driving up to sarasota tomorrow morning for 2 days. There’s going to be a pretty big family gathering. a belated xmas get-together, if you will. we’ve been required to bring with us our wedding day getup for some picture taking his mom has planned. The only thing i’m worried about is fitting into that dress again! i’ve gained 3 lbs since then but hopefully i will still fit in it somehow. ugh! i hate dressing up. not that i think i look bad or anything just that i always feel so fat these days. (yes i know i know “ur not fat!”) maybe i’m not but i FEEL it anyway.
so, my brother has decided to leave the states and move back to dr to face up to his responsibilites as husband and expectant father that he is. his wife is 4 mths pregnant now and not in such good shape either. hopefully having him there with her will help her thru the rest of her pregnancy. i hope it all works out for them… [fingers crossed]
in other news, I’m waiting for warren to show up here. he’s going to borrow my ‘portable’ parrot cage. beleive it or not, an african grey flew up to his car today and ‘adopted’ him. he’s going to try to find the owner tomorrow but in the meantime that parrot is destroying his house! and so he needs to put it into a cage until he decides what to do. I’m pretty saddened to hear that he just ‘found’ an african grey just like that. i know it’s owner must be really paining over it’s whearabouts. i lost mine and i feel hurt that i don’t still have her. seeing this mystery birds pictures brings back memories. he looks just like indiana. :’(
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