first, it started out as something cooked up between my sister and one of my friends over the phone. It was supposed to be just a little bbq on our new patio furniture to just chat and hang out. then xenia’s boyfriend asked if one of his friends could come. hell, it’s FREE FOOD after all. Then I was talking to my older brother and trying to help him recover some lost computer files over the phone and invited him and his 3 kids, .. so it grew from a 6 person bbq to a 11 person shindig.
So we went to BJ’s today and got some meat. A LOT of meat (they sell everything in bulk) and decided “well if we’re having enough food for 25 people we should at least invite dennis’ dad.. so I did, AND his aunt and uncle and their kid.
so a tiny 6 person hangout has morphed into a 15 person bbq food all you can eat blowout.
I’ll use this as trial run of jada’s first birthday party in which we have an invite list of 75 people. Jesus christ how will I cope. thank god birthday parties only last for a few hours and not a few days.
I’m again seriously considering and sortof think I should JUST DO IT with regard to finding a new home for kosh. I just don’t take care of him like he needs which is sad but I just have too many other things to worry about. I’m inclined to take him to the vet and make sure he’s OK before doing that and treating him for worms again if he needs it just so I know he’s healthy. He’s had pinworms before (twice) which adversely affects his appetite so he doesn’t eat well even when I DO feed him regularly. I’m so surprised he hasn’t died already but I guess cold blooded animals can save resources easily by just “sitting there”. He used to be so much more mobile. UGH. i feel bad about it.
yep, I’ll get him seen by the vet and up to par and then decide for sure what needs to happen. then at least if I give him to jason I won’t be handing him a sickly animal that could be a risk to his own kid. this is another reason I want to find him another home. I’m so paranoid for jada. anyways.. I’ll empty out his tank of all the sand, sanitize it, and take some poop to the vet for testing next week (ewwwww!)
wow 3 posts in one day… time to get away from the puter and do some housework.
| T |
Timeless |
| A |
Astounding |
| N |
Naive |
| I |
Insane |
| A |
Awkward |
Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com
and i haven’t even been back to work yet (early memorial day ‘vacation’). Jada has been sick. ugh! and tonight has been the worst night so far. doc sais it’s a virus but has ruled out strep. her throat is swollen so drinking her milk has been a challenge. motrin worked pretty well so far tho and she has had her milk tonight but it doesn’t seem to do much for helping her sleep. man, i feel so bad whenever she wakes up blubbering like that. She’s been up 3 times already and it’s not even 1am yet. I’m going to be tired as fuck tomorrow but i don’t think calling in is a good idea considering.
shit continues. we’ve been shopping around for furniture (b4 jada got sick) and the one we like the most is too big to fit the living room and too expensive. :O We looked at some used crap but sad thing is they’re just that. crap. i rather sit on a matt on the floor before sitting on the pieces of shit i’ve seen so far.
I called a few sod places yesterday and it looks like it’s all going to cost close to a grand. fuck! but it’s gotta get done regardless. it’s expensive to cover 3000 square feet of ground. (and here i thought it was going to cost between 2 and 3 hundred LOL!) it’s actually closer to 4000 but this is all we’re going to cover. everything else will stay plain dirt, maybe get mulched or it’s already covered with pavers. Maybe if we ever win the lottery we can just install a jacuzzi and pool back there and concrete everything left over. that would make lawn maintenance a cinch. heehee. wishful thinking.
so now we have a leak in our yard from one of the sprinkler system pvc pipes that runs straight thru the yard. it’s a big leak and i can’t ignore this one. It made a pool in the yard when i turned it on yesterday. juST GREAT! 
JUST when i thought we were ready for sod, this shit happens.
man, i don’t know if many people know but I can be a fucking nutcase when i’m in my own element and act like a total bafoon and shit. well while i was giving jada her dinner i started making “aaaahh” sounds that were downright scary (well i didn’t think they were scary at the time but…) then she started to look at me like she didn’t know who i was and her face was getting more and more scruntched up. well i wasn’t sure why (duh!!!) but after a little bit she stuck her lower lip out, her eyes got gassy and she started to tear up a little all while staring at me as if thinking “oh no, something has posessed my mommy!!”
i thought it was funny and did it a couple more times but it was apparent she didn’t think it was all that funny.
now i feel so guilty. how could i do that to my baby!?! 
i’m so bad (then why am i still laughing?) does this make me a bad mother ? ugh! :’(
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