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I woke up this morning as usual. With clogged sinuses, sneezing and unable to breath. After I drained my skull in the bathroom I just went to the living room and got on the computer. I felt tired but I felt OK. Then the kids woke up and I started to get Jada ready for daycare. When I saw how she had trashed her room I got pissed off and my morning went downhill from there. We’ve been teaching her to keep her room clean so when she does this (which has become more and more rare these days - Thank God!), we make her clean it up. But this morning she just wasn’t moving fast enough. When I told her to pick up her flash cards, she just did a lot of walking around like some listless autistic child. She wasn’t paying attention and instead was stepping all over her stuff. It took me asking her 15 times and threatening to spank her before she started to do it. By then my blood was boiling. If someone had taken my blood pressure right then they would have called 911 in a hurry.

I got Dennis up to help me out because I was about to snap. He fixed her breakfast and lunch and then tried to tell me it was too late to take her to daycare. He might as well have told me that wasn’t allowed to wear a bra ever again. I just knew we had to get Jada out of the house because I wasn’t going to be able to handle it. We had an argument and he finally just took her to school. Oh, and then he stepped back in the house to tell me that the minivan got a flat. Just Great.

After they left, I sat there stewing in my own misery and I realized then that I was just far too angry. This wasn’t just being annoyed at my kid and not enough sleep angry. This was overheated brain, shoot everything down with my lazer vision, blow up the world angry. Yup, it’s PMS alright. When I’m like this there are only two things that help me get through it. #1 realizing that that’s what it is, and #2 being left alone.

Then I calmed down a little, because Maya doesn’t annoy me as much …yet. I realize that Jada is a lot like I was when I was a kid but knowing that hasn’t helped me grow more patience. It’s really hard, she can be very difficult to deal with sometimes. It figures I get one like her. She’s subborn, a nag, emotional, slow to eat, and slow to follow instructions. Sound familiar?